Simply put, or maybe not

You do not start to become who you want to be until you are honest with yourself about who you are right now.

Sometimes you need to be honest with yourself about even the stuff that "sucks" about you. From time to time I feel like I am trying to force myself to be a certain way or to think a certain way, for whatever reason. But in forcing myself, I can never fully assume what it is that I think I should assume. It isn't until I have let go - or rather honestly assessed that I am being stupid or forceful or dishonest with myself - that I am able to truly see what it is that I want to become, that I should become, and how to get there.

Funny how brute force/self-fascism doesn't work with ourselves either. We hate it.

Dawn of a new era

Dear friends and fans-

I hope I haven't lost you for the lack of writing in my blog. But then again, did I ever really have you?

It is funny how life changes and how you have to adapt more to yourself than you do to your environment sometimes. It seems like that is my case most of the time. Change sucks but it is ultimately good. Here are some good changes:

My computer.

I have recently upgraded my computer. Here are some links to some of the fancy parts I decided to purchase:

• eVGA GeForce 8800GTS 320MB 320Bit Video card


• An extreme power supply from OCZ

AND

• a new case courtesy of Coolermaster complete with a pretty blue led fan in front.

I have also installed Windows Vista Ultimate 64-bit version on my computer as a dual boot with Windows XP Pro. So far I like Vista alright, but sometimes it has some quirky things with some of my hardware. My sound was working, but now it has a really empty metallic sound that I like to call "tingy." So this change might suck.

I wanted to post my new benchmark scores with my new hardware using 3dMark06. I don't have them on me, but I can tell you I went from about a 3200 to a 6900. Quite a jump and it is pretty obvious in game play.

Speaking of game playing, I have a bunch of new games, but I haven't really spent time playing them. The one I am most excited about is Half-Life2: Episode 2


I feel like the Half-Life game series is pretty underrated, but what do I know really?

Anyways, not exciting, but that is about it for now. Bless you all.

Matt